F/27 I won't actually kill myself I just think about it alot.
Regulus *getting all Os on his NEWTS*: light work, no reaction.
Regulus *poisoning his parents*: light work, no reaction.
Regulus *having to talk to james*: Okayy, it’s got a little kickk.
Dorcas: you’ll never find the body’ is such a boring threat. A better threat would be, youll never stop finding the body.
Barty, bored: Or just say, ‘They’ll be finding parts of you for at least four months…and you’ll still be alive for three of them.
Regulus: Now that’s a threat.
Evan, covering Pandora’s ears:
*horrified silence*
somehow instead of saying “as a treat”, I’ve started using the phrase “for morale”, as if my body is a ship and its crew, and I (the captain) have to keep us in high spirits, lest we suffer a mutiny in the coming days.
and so I will eat this small block of fancy cheese, for morale. I will take a break and drink some tea, for morale. I will pick up that weird bug, for morale.
I’m not sure if it helps, but it does entertain me
She mojoed in my dojo till i casad on my house
Canon fun facts about Allan:
- Allan has a kill count
- Allan fucks
- Allan supports women’s rights and wrongs
- Allan is a queer icon
- Allan can’t jump a fence for the life of him
- Allan dresses like a nerd and can fit in his buddy’s clothes
- Allan loves Ken so much he wants him to experience true happiness (in a “totally-not-gay” kind of way)
- Allan knows how to fight hand-to-hand combat unlike the Kens
- Allan has the ability to hear the narrator when no one else can
Regulus: baby-talking to a cat on the street
Sirius: giggling and filming it
Reg, slowly turning around and seeing the camera: PUT THAT DOWN
Sirius, running away as fast as he can: NO
Regulus: Fuck I messed up
Remus: What happened?
Regulus: I kissed James…
Remus: Fuck really?
Regulus: (Running his hands over his face) *Nods*
Remus: …
Remus: I owe Sirius so much money
*Regulus and Remus having a secret affair*
Evan: I thought your brother..
Regulus: I guess we’re both trying to get his attention.
Evan: Oh that’s what you’re looking for? Sirius’ attention?
Barty: If my father gave me half of the attention Sirius gives you I would have had a childhood.
Evan: Meanwhile Potter-
Regulus: He’s straight
Barty: No he’s not! He’s sixteen, no one is straight at sixteen. Straight is a decision you make when you have to give your mother an heir.
Regulus: What are you then?
Barty: I’m fucking around
I just want to share this conversation between me and my best friend that had autistic moonwater vibes…I have no explanation but we’re two halves of a whole idiot
Fuck Romeo and Juliet,
Fuck Jack and Rose,
In fact, fuck romantic relationships,
I want what these bitches have:
- James Potter and Sirius Black
- Regulus Black and Pandora Lovegood
- Remus Lupin and Lily Evans
- Mary Macdonald and Marlene McKinnon
pandora was to regulus what lily was to remus
regulus: since when did your type become an oblivious idiot?
remus, eyeing him: i don’t know regulus, you tell me
regulus: fuck you
remus: yeah, no. neither of them would like that
regulus: stop it, oh my god! why are we even friends??
Sirius: You may be mother and father’s favourite child but I’m Remus and James’s favourite person.
Regulus, smirking: Is that so?
Remus: You know I might switch brothers.
Sirius, shocked and horrified: Moony, how could you?! At least I have James that will never betray me!
James, sweating nervously: I plead the fith?
Sirius: At least I’m for sure Peter’s favourite person.
Peter, always down to help create chaos: Well your brother is better looking.
Sirius: You’re all traitors. So mean, all of you.
Regulus: You know, Remus, if you ever did want to see what it’s like to date the better looking brother…
Sirius: *throws a pillow at Regulus’s head*
James, definitely not jealous: Now, wait a second!
Remus: You look like shit
Regulus: I feel like shit
Remus: same
The main difference between James and Sirius and Remus and regulus is that James and Sirius would leave you on read because they genuinely forgot to respond while Remus and regulus would leave you on read just because.
